Heartbreaking

Sitting on my bed, lappy was on my lap. My both cell phones remain silent since am no longer needed by anyone. Thinking of thing went so bad and bad and bad. As usual my life ain't like other teenagers and no one willing to fix my shoes. My shoes has through so much pains, she's hurt walking my life along wimme. But she never get tired, always stay and faithful. She through every hard and tough time without complaining but I know she need a rest to eliminate the tiredness. She looked so pale and severe, pity of her.

Well, that's just the parable how I passed my everyday. From one to another one obstacles came into my life. I know well how to overcome every of it but sometime I've lost the strengths and stuck myself at everywhere. All I know to cover the sadness by smiling my face to everyone. 

Straight to the point, I just got a heartbreaking news about the one I love, the one I trusted on, the one who I thought would be my last forever. He broke my heart into pieces. I don't know how to handle cause I lost my mind. I cant think properly. I cried myself to sleep every night thinking of how could this happened to me. He did something I never expect to be, and he did it. I just can't forgive eventho he keep persuade me for 5 days in a row but I just can't stop thinking about thing he did. 

I know everyone do mistake and so do I, but how to forgive if thing was told by others not sincerely by his own self? He just not being honest to me that's hurt me so bad. Oh, I don't have to expose his wrong doing I just express my terrible feeling inside :( I told my mum about this and she said that, you shouldn't have this kind of problem at this ages, all you have to think of is about your studies and studies for your better future. And it makes me to think that i should have to end this problem and forget all those stupid thingy. 

Babe, you should have not to say a thing if you don't know well our feeling towards each other. I know he love me tightly but yeah he just can't control himself. I know it doesn't make a sense.I believe he has his own explanation and I just don't wanna hear. Now, it  just bring me out of his life. I don't wanna stay and being sad again. I don't wanna be hurt cause I've been through the pain.

P/s: Happy Chinese New Year for those who's celebrating :)